First- Time Mom's Survival to the Col-ICKY Period

I'll never forget the first time that I went away with A and my hubby to the Hamptons for a weekend.  A was about 4 weeks old and being first time parents, we thought A acted like the typical newborn.  She cried- a lot.  I was thrilled to get away for a bit, figuring my parents would help us out and I would get a few minutes to myself here and there.  But when my mom, my-cool-and-collected-mom, couldn't console A's crying and I caught my parents worrisome glances, I realized that maybe, just maybe, A was a bit different than the typical happy-go-lucky newborn... if there is such a thing.

After having a cry-off at the beach (where my dad suggested maybe it wasn't a beach day for us) and marching the hallway all weekend shaking, I called my pediatrician.  He found that A had a bout of reflux. He prescribed medication that helped A's feeding issues, but the crying.... oh the crying....

It just didn't stop.

I take that back, it subsided around 7-8 weeks, peaking at about 6-7 weeks.  Since that point, it's like someone swapped out my baby for a much happier version.  During those first 6-7 weeks, I broke out in sweats, cried, and researched every which way to make the colickiness "extended crying periods"(as per my lactation consultant), end.  There really wasn't much I could do to "end" this period for her.  A really had to grow out of it on her own.  There were lots of tidbits of knowledge I acquired from reading, trial and error and pieces of wisdom from friends/family that did seem to help get me, I mean, my baby, through this stage.

1. Support- first and foremost, call your pediatrician.  Make sure there is nothing "wrong" with your baby that could be contributing to these crying spells.  Then, if you are nursing, call your lactation consultant.  Cry to both of these people.  They are there to help and coach you through parenting.  Then call your friends/family.  Ask for help.  Be real.  Know that you can't go through it alone. Realize that you can't wave a magic wand and make these extended crying periods end, but you must muddle through them and find strategies to help you cope.
2. Baby Carrier-  I bought my Ergo probably when A was about 4 weeks old.  Realistically I couldn't hold her 24/7.   The Ergo... thank God for the Ergo.... it kept her close to me, while confining her/swaddling her.   I was also able to walk around to give her some motion.  Best of all,  I was hands free. 
3. White Noise- Get a noise machine, a white noise app or turn on the hood fan over your stove.  Increase the volume to match the intensity of her screaming.  Sometimes it really works.  
4. Keep Moving- my baby needed motion and very specific, rhythmic motions to comfort her.  Try different positions- rock in a rocker, swing, car or stroller. 
5. Pacifiers- Being a speech-language pathologist, I was weary about the pacifier.  Really not a fan of forming habits that I'm going to have to fight A to break later on.  But truthfully no one ever walks down the isle with a paci in their mouth, do they? A needs her paci to comfort her.  Play around with different types and figure out which one is best for her.  Some will pop right out of their mouths and some the baby may or may not prefer over others.  She is great with the Dr. Brown's pacifier 0-6 month.  Once A is sleeping, I pop the paci right out of her mouth.... no need for her to keep it all night long... 
6. Positioning- A's favorite position is sleeping on her belly on top my chest.  She is still comforted this way in the early morning.  I practice calm, deep breathing while she is laying on top of me so that hopefully it regulates her system and she can calm down too.  It actually works.  You can also try the football hold, laying her on her side or over your knees (belly facing down).  Remember that "back is best" for sleeping, but there are so many other positions to calm your baby while he is awake and you are supervising him.
7. Bath time-  Initially A hated bath time, but then all of a sudden it was the one 15 minute stretch of time that she enjoyed.  Run warm water and use Aveeno Lavender wash.  Then, I would give A a nice massage using Burt's Bees lavender body cream.  Lavender is supposed to be a very calming scent.  She still really enjoys this routine before bedtime.  
8. Have a Glass of Wine- my lactation consultant and pediatrician both agreed that one glass of wine every once in a while immediately after I nursed A was perfectly fine.  Well, I thought I would never need such a thing... I mean... I am a mom now... Then, I realized, I DO need such a thing, I am a mom now.  LOL.  
9. Find a Babysitter- There were very few people I would leave A to at this time due to her fussy nature.  But, I had to, HAD to leave once in a while for my own sanity.  Once I left for an hour to watch the sunset, another time to take a pilates class, another just to run and grab a cup of coffee.  Don't judge.  It's called sanity.... and after an hour to yourself, you will realize that you are ready to start at number 1 all over again with a bit of a clearer, more rested mindset.  
10. Sleep- or try to.  

I truly believe that the harder weeks let me appreciate the sweeter ones.  Nighty night.

xo

J

Helpful Parenting Books

As a scared, overly- enthusiastic mother-to-be, I decided that I would learn all there was to know about parenting while I was pregnant, so that by the time I had my baby, I would be suited with well-equipped armor ready to take on Battle of the Baby.

I read two books.  Well, three actually, but I don't think Belly Laughs by none other than Playmate, Jenny McCarthy, counts as sophisticated parenting literature.  Anyway, as much as these books made me feel like Super-Mom-To-Be, there was nothing like being throttled right into parenting.  I mean, one day you don't have a baby and the next day, you do.  I did find these two books helpful.  After all, I did hear these authors whispering sweet nothings in my ear as I was rocking my colicky baby in the loneliness of night.  I have to say, I'm glad I was well-equipped, but life experience, as always takes precedence.

1.  The Happiest Baby on the Block by Harvey Karp
This book helped me learn about the author's theory about the "missing fourth trimester" and how to calm and soothe your newborn.  In this book, you will learn about the 5 soothing strategies called the 5 S's: Swaddle, Swing, Shh, Suck... and ah! there is one more that I just can't remember.  Use these 5 S's day in and day out.  Remember them.  Read them to your partner. And, in my opinion, there is such thing as colic extended crying periods.  Hang in there.

2.  Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child by Marc Weissbluth, MD.
This bible book will teach you the importance of healthy sleep habits and establish appropriate sleep patterns, instead of breaking poor sleeping habits that develop later on.  Okay, I may be jumping the gun, because who knows what A will be like years from now in terms of her sleeping habits, but one strong belief I have as an SLP and now a mom is that sleeping your child is just as important as feeding your child.  My days and nights are focused on 1-2 hours of wakefulness ONLY and then soothing her to sleep.  Eat.  Play.  Sleep.  Repeat.

A bit of a boring post, but for all of you out there looking to get your hands dirty, these were definitely helpful.

Remember:  Never, and I mean, never wake a sleeping baby.

Peace, love and sweet-reads,
J

My New Uniform

My newest addition, baby A, arrived on 7/7.  She has quickly become my world.  I went back to work when she was only 8 weeks old.  Luckily for me, I work only 15 hours/week in a local elementary school.  I decided to put early intervention/private therapy work on hold for the moment so I could focus on staying at home with my daughter.

My baby spits up. A lot.  So, my part-time SAHM wardrobe is an array of black leggings and sweats (the cute ones).  I was thinking today about how this mundane, Stacy-and-Clinton-would-kill-me, wardrobe has truly become my new uniform....

....for the best job of my life.

A is healthy, aware and delightful.  She had her colicky-cry-24-hours-a-day period.  So, don't worry, I've put in the agonizing hours.  But, my days with her are filled with playtime, nursing and napping.

How do you play with an 11 week old?  So glad you asked!!  Stay tuned for some fun, speech pathologist approved play strategies to engage your newborn..... get ready to WORK, and you may need want to change into your new uniform for this job.